The Marching Morons by C. M. Kornbluth

(7 User reviews)   5214
By Jacob Brown Posted on Dec 22, 2025
In Category - Space Opera
Kornbluth, C. M. (Cyril M.), 1923-1958 Kornbluth, C. M. (Cyril M.), 1923-1958
English
Ever feel like the world is getting... dumber? What if that wasn't just a feeling, but a terrifying reality? In 'The Marching Morons,' C. M. Kornbluth throws a 20th-century salesman into a future where intelligence is a rare, endangered trait. The smart people are gone, and the planet is run by the blissfully, dangerously stupid. This sharp, darkly funny story asks what happens when common sense is no longer common, and it feels more relevant than ever. It’s a short, punchy read that will make you laugh, then make you think hard.
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would be good for nothing but the shard pile back of his slip tanks. A business conference was in full swing in his shop, a modest cube of brick, tile-roofed, as the Chicago-Los Angeles "rocket" thundered overhead--very noisy, very swept-back, very fiery jets, shaped as sleekly swift-looking as an airborne barracuda. The buyer from Marshall Fields was turning over a black-glazed one liter carafe, nodding approval with his massive, handsome head. "This is real pretty," he told Hawkins and his own secretary, Gomez-Laplace. "This has got lots of what ya call real est'etic principles. Yeah, it is real pretty." "How much?" the secretary asked the potter. "Seven-fifty each in dozen lots," said Hawkins. "I ran up fifteen dozen last month." "They are real est'etic," repeated the buyer from Fields. "I will take them all." "I don't think we can do that, doctor," said the secretary. "They'd cost us $1,350. That would leave only $532 in our quarter's budget. And we still have to run down to East Liverpool to pick up some cheap dinner sets." "Dinner sets?" asked the buyer, his big face full of wonder. "Dinner sets. The department's been out of them for two months now. Mr. Garvy-Seabright got pretty nasty about it yesterday. Remember?" "Garvy-Seabright, that meat-headed bluenose," the buyer said contemptuously. "He don't know nothin' about est'etics. Why for don't he lemme run my own department?" His eye fell on a stray copy of _Whambozambo Comix_ and he sat down with it. An occasional deep chuckle or grunt of surprise escaped him as he turned the pages. Uninterrupted, the potter and the buyer's secretary quickly closed a deal for two dozen of the liter carafes. "I wish we could take more," said the secretary, "but you heard what I told him. We've had to turn away customers for ordinary dinnerware because he shot the last quarter's budget on some Mexican piggy banks some equally enthusiastic importer stuck him with. The fifth floor is packed solid with them." "I'll bet they look mighty est'etic." "They're painted with purple cacti." * * * * * The potter shuddered and caressed the glaze of the sample carafe. The buyer looked up and rumbled, "Ain't you dummies through yakkin' yet? What good's a seckertary for if'n he don't take the burden of _de_-tail off'n my back, harh?" "We're all through, doctor. Are you ready to go?" The buyer grunted peevishly, dropped _Whambozambo Comix_ on the floor and led the way out of the building and down the log corduroy road to the highway. His car was waiting on the concrete. It was, like all contemporary cars, too low-slung to get over the logs. He climbed down into the car and started the motor with a tremendous sparkle and roar. "Gomez-Laplace," called out the potter under cover of the noise, "did anything come of the radiation program they were working on the last time I was on duty at the Pole?" "The same old fallacy," said the secretary gloomily. "It stopped us on mutation, it stopped us on culling, it stopped us on segregation, and now it's stopped us on hypnosis." "Well, I'm scheduled back to the grind in nine days. Time for another firing right now. I've got a new luster to try...." "I'll miss you. I shall be 'vacationing'--running the drafting room of the New Century Engineering Corporation in Denver. They're going to put up a two hundred-story office building, and naturally somebody's got to be on hand." "Naturally," said Hawkins with a sour smile. There was an ear-piercingly sweet blast as the buyer leaned on the horn button....

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Picture this: John Barlow, a sharp-witted businessman from the 1950s, is accidentally revived from suspended animation centuries into the future. He wakes up expecting flying cars and robot butlers. Instead, he finds a world where intelligence has been quietly bred out of humanity. The vast majority of people are, to put it bluntly, morons—incapable of basic logic or problem-solving. A tiny, secretive cabal of smart people keeps society running, desperately hiding the truth from the masses they manage. Barlow, seeing a golden opportunity, decides to use his old-school salesmanship to take control of this bizarre new world.

Why You Should Read It

Kornbluth wrote this in the 1950s, but reading it today is a wild experience. It’s not a stuffy prediction of the future; it’s a darkly hilarious and deeply cynical mirror held up to our own fears about anti-intellectualism and populism. The story moves fast and hits hard, blending satire with genuine suspense. Barlow isn't a hero—he's a clever opportunist, which makes his actions all the more compelling and unsettling. The central idea—what if being smart was a evolutionary dead end?—sticks with you long after you finish the last page.

Final Verdict

This is a perfect pick for fans of classic sci-fi like Philip K. Dick or anyone who loves a story with a biting, satirical edge. It’s short, so it’s great for a commute or an afternoon when you want a complete, thought-provoking narrative. If you’ve ever scrolled through social media and wondered where all the common sense went, this story from 1951 might just feel like it was written yesterday.



⚖️ Copyright Free

This digital edition is based on a public domain text. It serves as a testament to our shared literary heritage.

Christopher Clark
10 months ago

Used this for my thesis, incredibly useful.

Richard Wilson
1 year ago

A bit long but worth it.

5
5 out of 5 (7 User reviews )

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